Lowell — When Lowell High School senior Maddie Brown’s mother was in the final stages of ALS, she expressed her wishes to live to see Maddie graduate.
When it became clear that Katie Berghoef wouldn’t survive until spring, LHS administrators organized an early graduation for Maddie in December. She and her friends wore caps and gowns and Maddie walked across the stage to receive her diploma in the high school auditorium.
“I am extremely grateful that the school helped organize that so my mom could see it. Now It’s a memory I will be able to have forever,” said Maddie, whose mother died Feb. 5 at age 42.
Berghoef was nonverbal by the time the early graduation took place, but her emotions were evident.
“She had the biggest smile on her face and you could see by the look on her face that she was feeling proud of me,” Maddie said.
Maddie will officially graduate Thursday, May 21, culminating four years of juggling classes, work, friendships and the reality of her mom’s situation. She recently finished her final courses: AP Government, physics and three online courses. She plans to attend Northern Michigan University to major in psychology.
“(Lowell High School) was extremely supportive, and all my teachers, too. It was nice because it took a lot of pressure off. Having good grades is very important to me. … I took two weeks off when my mom passed and they excused all my work. It was a very relieving feeling,” she said.
‘That kind of love doesn’t leave; it becomes part of who you are and how you keep moving forward.’
— Tessa Heeringa, LHS academic and career coach
A ‘Shocking’ Diagnosis
Maddie grew up in Lowell and spent her entire K-12 education in district schools. She’s had the same circle of friends and has been connected with the same families since kindergarten. Her mom was an integral part of that community, working in local restaurants and a factory, and, with her longtime partner Ryan Kuipers, raising Maddie, her brother, Mason, 19, and Kuipers’ daughter, Paisley, 12.
Berhoef’s illness hit hard, Maddie said, recalling how it started.
“We were just moving into a new house and she kept dropping things because she was losing feelings in her left arm,” Maddie said.
Berghoef acted like it wasn’t a big deal, but told the family about her diagnosis later that summer.
“It was very shocking and I didn’t fully understand what ALS was until I did the research. It’s a crazy disease and I never heard of it prior to this. … It progressed faster than I thought it would. She was nonverbal and unable to move for a really long time.”
‘One Step and A Time’
Maddie talks about her mom’s vitality, strong work ethic and their shared love of animals, water and the Upper Peninsula. On her forearms, Maddie has tattoos in honor of her mom: of two koi fish with the phrase “to the moon and back,” and of flowers and her mother’s death date.
“One of my favorite things about my mom is she never let the disease take her spirit,” she said. “She never wanted anyone to be sad, and she wanted everyone to be in the moment and take life one step at a time and not worry about the future, but just be present.”
Even after she lost mobility, Berghoef had a fun-loving approach to life, which was evident when she was on the water.
“She had a water wheelchair and she would tell us to throw her on there, push her out into the lake and leave her there and that she would be fine,” Maddie recalled. “We would swim out there around her, and she would be on the lake for hours.”
Berghoef reminded Maddie to stay in the present, focus on school and to not get lost in worry.
“She had a very joyful energy and I think that’s very admirable, because she was going through something unimaginable and she never let it tear her down.”
The Community Comes Together
LHS academic and career coach Tessa Heeringa helped organize the early graduation with other staff members, Maddie and her friends and family.
“Seeing Maddie graduate with her mom there was incredibly powerful. It was more than a ceremony; it was love, strength and community all in one space. You could feel how much that moment meant to everyone there,” Heeringa said. “What stays with me most is Maddie. The way she showed up, the strength she carried and the love that surrounds her. That kind of love doesn’t leave; it becomes part of who you are and how you keep moving forward. You can see it in her, in the way she keeps going, and in the way she carries her story with so much quiet strength.”
English teacher Kristin Mooney said Maddie’s genuine nature shines through all the time.
“She is just a good human being. I think in part because her path has not always been easy, she is someone who is deeply empathetic and visibly cares about the people in her life,” Mooney said. “I am completely confident that not in spite of but because of what she has faced, she is going to be an exceptional woman who is hardworking, funny, competitive, but above all deeply caring to those around her. She already is.”
Evy Frey, one of Maddie’s best friends, described Maddie as strong minded, intelligent and ambitious.
“I think about how much she has grown from everything she has gone through, and how she has the integrity to keep going forward and the things she wants to achieve,” Evy said. “She is very smart and she is very strong — I am very very proud of her, and I know she is going to be successful in any career she chooses.”
Maddie said the lessons she learned from her mom stay with her as she looks to her future.
“The biggest thing I learned is to not take the little things for granted. My mom would always say, ‘You need to start living in the moment; be here, be present.’”
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